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Does your digital persona = your real life?


I lost my wife a month ago

After she died, I did eventually share the fact online, but then I started thinking:


Do we only share the good aspects of our lives online?

I’ve share online that my wife has passed away (read here how and why). In many ways I didn’t have a choice as both her and I have prominent digital profiles and quite unique names (I’m the only Robert Fransgaard in the world). And I’m fine with it. It’s no secret and it saves people from wondering whether or not they can talk to me about it.

But since then I have spoken to quite a few Twitter friends who have gone through similar personal issues.

And I realised how isolated people can feel in social media as you always try to project the good aspects of your life… possibly at the expense of your real life.

But does that mean you isolate yourself just when you really need support?

Are we creating an online world full of flawless people by not admitting any short comings?

Does social media force you into a position where you are all alone with your problems fearing that if you share them with anybody your problems suddenly make their way online and attack the polished surface of your online profile? Maybe even affecting your career and recruitability?

Responding blog post from Fatima Roels


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  • My digital persona pretty much represents me.  On the other hand, when I
    Facebooked the following, I got ridiculed by one “friend,” ignored by
    everyone else:  “you know what Facebook looks like when you are
    impoverished?  It is Breakfast at Tiffany’s – minus the comedy.  It is a
    daily show of what other people can have, and you have not had a breath
    of in years.  Birthdays, iPhones, Christmas, fruit…”  When I wrote (buried inside a blog post), “We
    each see light at end of tunnels we wouldn’t have even approached on
    our own,” this gets dug out of the post and tweeted by several people. 
    Nice, but they’re people who would not cross the street to piss on me if
    I was on fire.

    You have friends, and while they might not know you like some of your
    best friends who you cannot talk with, you actually never need to feel
    alone.  Just give us a chance.